I have always been someone who has a heightened sense of justice. This causes me to take fault very seriously when something goes wrong. I know I am not the only one who deals with this. It might be all of the “law and order-esque” crime shows or growing up learning to follow the rules and do what is right. Above all, I think I believe so strongly in understanding fault because nowadays so few people do.
We are a culture that tells our young people that nothing is their fault. We over-diagnose and pass the blame and don’t make our kids and young adults own up to their problems. We tell our kids that it’s not their fault that no one wants to play with them, when the real problem is the child is mean and doesn’t share his toys. We tell our youth that it’s not their fault when they don’t win trophies, when we know they didn’t practice nearly as hard as their competition. We tell our young adults that it’s not their fault they don’t have a job, when we know they could have done a lot more while they were school to network and break into their industry. All of these excuses give our young people a complex that makes them believe nothing is their fault.
The problem with this occurrence is that employers are not going to be equally excusing of these people’s problems. After being told that nothing is their fault, the first time these young people get called out on an issue they will not know how to handle the situation in a mature manner. This can lead to lying or shifting the blame, which will not impress an employer.
It’s important to teach your children how to accept blame when it is legitimate, and deal with issues maturely. Nothing is worse than an adult that refuses to work on their own issues or even own up to them. Having this skill will help your children become a better person. By acknowledging their faults, they can begin to work out the issues they have in their lives in a safe environment with the support of their families. Teach your children that bad choices don’t make them a bad person, but they will be held accountable for the choices.