As adults, we’ve learned to work through our disappointments with at least some measure of grace. Having to watch our children be disappointed is tough, though. Not at first… the little fits of a toddler not getting what he wants can almost be cute. I’m talking about the “not-making-the-team,” “getting-dumped,” “not-getting-in-to-the-desired-college” -type disappointment. It hurts us almost as much as it does our child. No matter the possible pain, do not avoid having these experiences.  What is the old phrase? Oh yes: “It’s better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.”

  Gifted kids are prone to fear failure. They would rather quit than risk failure. It’s my belief that that is the reason so many “lack” in life in comparison to their non-gifted peers. They don’t risk big, so they miss great opportunities. From the very beginning, you’ve got to teach your kids that it’s worth the risk of failure… that failure may hurt, but it’s rarely fatal!

   Engineering is a great place to start. Engineers don’t throw out an idea and start all over. They tweak the idea until they get what they want. They understand that the best ideas come after the first ideas are used up. Teach your gifted child that each attempt is just a part of the process, not an end in and of itself. Then when disappointment comes, you can be the shoulder to cry on, but you also help initiate the next step back to success.

-       Michelle