We are to the end of the robotics season at school, and I am already setting goals for next year’s competition season. Isn’t that the way we work? We don’t even take a day off before we’re planning what we can do better next time!
Goals are so important, though. I have come to the conclusion that the ultimate “aha moment” in school is the moment a student realizes that we teachers are here to help him realize his goal. Before that moment, he is just going to school because he has to. Once he sees that we can be used to help him reach his goal, the working relationship becomes a side-by-side effort toward a shared goal, rather than a push from behind and a carrot out front.
I had the pleasure of the company of one of my student’s parents on the trip home from robotics competition. I listened as she told of gaining her university education in Vietnam. She told of having to choose teaching as a profession instead of a medical profession because her family did not have enough money to build her a practice after school. She spoke of dorm rooms, the same size as ours, with 24 students in each room. Studying was impossible in that condition and there was no library, so she would find a street lamp or building light outside and sit under it studying till late into the night, all the time worrying about being assaulted. Toward the end of her college education, the university got a library. It would quickly fill up, so she and a friend would switch off holding each other’s spot and going to eat dinner just so both could be assured a safe study area. She ended up getting hired to teach by that very university and loved it. I see that same drive in her own children, each of whom is in a class two or three years ahead of what he/she should be in according to chronological age.
Parents often ask me, “But how do I get my child to that ‘aha moment’?” That is the million dollar question. My advise is to take him to college campuses and let him see what’s ahead. Don’t go on a summer day; go on a day when the campus is hopping with activity. Give your child a vision of herself doing what these kids are doing. Also, begin in early middle school pointing out strengths you see in your child. “I’ve noticed that you seem to be able to see the bigger picture and not fall apart when things don’t go the way you’d like. Do you know who has to do that in their job? Managers, administrators, chief operating officers. You might consider a job in business or management.”
Your teen will have a counselor at school, but you are the best advocate for your child. You know him/her the best. You know strengths and weaknesses and how your child deals with stress and responds to certain situations. Besides that, you’re the one God chose to mentor this young soul. So, if you want a goal-driven teen, actively seek to motivate your child to make goals. I guarantee you will not have any regrets!
- Michelle